Kamis, 07 Februari 2008

Posh?s unsightly knees shut down New York City

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I’m pretty sure I love the Daily Mail’s obsession with knees more than I love kittens, chocolate, and fluffy clouds. It seriously is that great. If you were to believe the Daily Mail’s headline, you’d know that today Victoria Beckham's “knobbly knees are the talk of New York.” I have to tell you, this is the best example of truthful, accurate, and ethical journalism I’ve seen all week. I live in New York, so I can verify with 100 percent accuracy that Posh’s knees are absolutely all anyone is talking about. All I saw at the newsstand this morning were embarrassing knee photos - and everyone was whispering and giggling. My inbox was flooded, and the trains stopped running - because the conductors couldn’t focus on keeping the cars on the tracks when they were so blinded by Posh’s knees.

Victoria Beckham arrived in New York ready for the city's fashion week, but it wasn't her outfit that had onlookers talking - it was her knobbly knees. Posh Spice also flashed her unsightly wrinkly thighs as she headed out for a shopping trip yesterday.

Perhaps the strain of performing with the Spice Girls in four-inch heels is getting to Victoria's slender legs. Her penchant for towering stilettos has already taken a toll on her feet - she was spotted with giant bunions while on stage last week.

Dressed in an elegant camel coat, black mini-skirt and knee-high platform boots, the 33-year-old cut a lonely figure as she shopped in Manhattan without her husband David, who is busy training in LA.

[From the Daily Mail]

They actually closed down JFK as a result of the knees. Seeing Posh's knobbly knees actually made the Statue of Liberty double check her own skirt placement. In fact Victoria’s knees are the direct cause of the Spice Girl’s tour cancellation. Okay I’m done with that, you get the point. I love the implication that Posh’s general leg “unsightliness” has somehow made her lonely and husbandless. This is the second time in less than two weeks that the Daily Mail has written a featured article with a headline attacking a celebrity’s supposedly disgusting knees. What the hell, Daily Mail? Who has good looking knees? They're just one of those body parts you're supposed to do your best to avoid when you look someone up and down. Unfortunately they don’t post the names of the articles’ authors, so there’s no way to know if it’s just one crazy, knee-obsessive Brit or if the paper as a whole has knee issues. Do the British in general hate knees? Or is it more that they hate Posh and Eva Longoria? I could make an argument either way. Let's hope Posh doesn't read the Daily Mail - clearly she already has some body issues.

Picture Note by JayBird: Header of Posh arriving to the Brasserie Restaurant at the Royalton Hotel in New York City today. Clearly she learned her lesson and covered her knees so she didn’t bring traffic to a halt. Images thanks to Splash. Here’s an older Posh knee photo from the last time she was in NYC for fashion week on September 11th. Images thanks to PR Photos.

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